The Weird & The Wonderful

2012-02-11T02:55:00.001+08:00

my good friend, lucien decides to cook a fabulous western meal for my ex-colleague & I.

We ended the night with the greatest laugh & our bellies filled.

2012-02-08T05:38:00.000+08:00

Though time is ticking furiously, I can't help to wish some times would stay.

2012-02-06T00:24:00.001+08:00

painting by Vincent Van Gogh

"Starry, starry night.
Paint your palette blue and grey,
Look out on a summer's day,
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul."

you came when i needed you

the rescue to my very soul.

You walked the starry night with me,

with eyes to know the darkness in my soul.

2012-02-02T03:49:00.001+08:00

As i stare blankly at the salmon-coloured walls,

i asked myself, "why am i not matched with the colour of my room?"

I meet with grey every single day.

The more grey the more bitter i am....

The more grey the more paranoid i am....

when will i ever find the pink in me?

2012-01-30T22:14:00.001+08:00

New Year New Life

To fulfill my new year resolution, i promise myself to be HAPPY. Last year, i thought i lost almost everything. I thought it was the end. Now, I'm at the stage where i feel grateful. Also, i found love. A new chapter begins.

-little notes i gave JR during NAC days. Though i miss those days, we shall anticipate for more (:

2012-01-30T20:56:00.000+08:00

This blog shall no longer be a venting ground.

This blog will inspire me more and more.

I hereby, re-open this blog.

2011-08-29T02:27:00.002+08:00

I think i'm going slightly mad.
Your actions, thoughts and words confused me.
I'm afraid to fall deeper, yet i have no clue why do i feel this way.
It was easy to shun away from the others but why not you?
It is as if there's this propelling factor pushing me to you.

Why do i bother to entertain you?
Why do i even worry what to reply you?
We are of different worlds, different calibre

What is that factor?
Am I just thinking too much?
Am I even in love?

You're confusing me my friend.

2011-07-24T03:16:00.002+08:00

i have to go on being a

GREAT PRETENDER

2011-07-24T02:59:00.000+08:00

Force yourself to use your brain,
The only way to gain,
A lot of things are just a lie.
This world we love comes down in pain
With hate and bloody games
A question-mark up in the sky.

Look, you can't keep away
And you can't hide
Tomorrow, yesterday, today ...

Some people say, we'll do it better
Some people say, everything's good
Some people sing, let's come together
But nobody has ever brought it through
Maybe you and me ...

This song is dedicated to you.
To think how much you have hurt me, it irks me that i missed you more. Crying days and Endless nights never seemed to fade...searching around my room for your things and packing them one by one just pains me. It's like packing you into a paper bag and its goodbye. Its really the end, i know i have to get that fact into my head. I'm really wished things could be the same but i can't be the one clapping all the time.

I miss you really and i can't do anything about it.

2011-07-20T10:32:00.001+08:00

Blue Moon
You saw me standing alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

2011-06-12T17:57:00.000+08:00

To abandon those who abandon us and
To love those who love us.
Accept the new and leave the old.

2011-06-12T04:56:00.000+08:00

-stole this from Jordan.
the question, and if he does, is it the same? is it?

2011-06-09T02:20:00.000+08:00

I know i have been neglecting this space. Sorry.
My life is revolves around work, the new house, friends, desperate boys and work and work and work...
just check out my tumblr... though its nothing much.

xoxo

2011-06-03T01:59:00.000+08:00

Little Anthony - Tears On My Pillow

2011-05-29T23:02:00.002+08:00

tomorrow agenda.

LEAVE LORONG CHUAN FOR WORK.
WORK WORK WORK WORK WORK
LEAVE FOR HOME...............................
@ BISHAN.

2011-05-04T23:57:00.000+08:00

From a BUM to a Workaholic!

Not really a workaholic but i can't think of a word to suit that title. After 3 months of bumming, i found a full-time job at the National Arts Council helping out in the Singapore Writers festival. I find my status or occupation name to be weird? I am a Temporary Sector Development Officer doing all the admin stuff. Today was my second day and yes i felt like a blur sotong. Everybody is so independent ! You don't even need to say bye when you leave? pretty different from my internship. However i can't stand the Auntie sitting opposite me. She pisses me off and i am very far away from my partners :( So i feel pretty isolated.

Other than that, the Singapore Writers Festival will broaden my knowledge about the interesting Authors around the world. Even though its boring but it beats bumming at home thinking about all the ridiculous things.

Goodnight.

2011-05-02T06:38:00.002+08:00

ARIES

The moment you come across an Aries, the first thing that comes to your mind is his/her friendly nature. The friendliest person in your neighborhood will most probably be an Aries personality. People having an Aries profile cannot tolerate injustice, always fight against it and will defend the weak. Aries, The Ram, is the first sign of the zodiac, considered to be the infant representing birth. Just like an infant, he is also aware only of himself and his needs. However, he is not selfish. It's just that he is totally ignorant of the fact that his needs may be causing you some inconvenience.

The innocence of Aries people is enough to cover their, sometimes, aggressive behavior. This naiveté brings fearlessness, while at the same time making them highly vulnerable. They trust people easily, get hurt in the process, forgive and forget, and then, trust again. An Aries person is beyond shrewdness and fallacy and can never lie, not even to save his life. He is what he seems to be. Qualities like subtlety, diplomacy or modesty just don't gel with Aries symbol. An Aries can be calm, wise and serious, but not before he has gone past youth.

He is pretty impatient, but liberal with money and material things. Frankness, lack of stability, fear of physical pain, optimism and impulsiveness are some of the basic Aries characteristics. One of the warmest and the most generous zodiac sign, Aries always prefers fame to money. He may get extremely angry in a minute, but the anger seldom lasts for a long time. Aries people never nurse a grudge and completely forgive and forget. They will never let you know that they are hurt.

They are never shy of apologizing, but they will be hurt if you remember the harsh words they said in anger, but didn't mean. Gossip does not interest an Aries and for him, people are either black or white, without any shades of grey. There is one thing an Aries can never fall short of, conversation. He can speak about anything & everything under the sun. He lives in the present and is a realist, yet believes in miracles. Aries chase success, not waiting for it to fall in their lap, and don't accept defeat. Failure can never keep them down.

Most of the Aries people are involved in business or creative arts or are involved in planning and organization. If an Aries does something for you, don't forget to express your gratitude. Otherwise, he will be deeply hurt. However, that would not stop him from helping again. Aries usually stick to their opinion and won't listen to anything they do not believe. They have a contemplative side to their personality. The simplicity is blended with the blind passion of a born crusader. Aries is mentally strong and always one of the pioneers.

Now you see how horoscopes can read you like a book? it is so scary because they are almost right about me and i'm an aries.

2011-05-02T05:19:00.001+08:00

“That was the thing. You never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it’s reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking.”

—	Sarah Dessen (The Truth about Forever)

2011-05-01T01:02:00.000+08:00

In any case, though, i believe that i have not been fair to you and that, as a result, I must have led you around in circles and hurt you deeply. In doing so, however, i have led myself around in circles and hurt myself just as deeply. I say this not as an excuse or a means of self-justification but because it is true. If i have left a wound inside you, it is not just your wound but mine as well. So please try not to hate me. I am a flawed human being- a far more flawed human being than you realize. Which is precisely why i do not want you to hate me. Because if you were to do that, I would really go to pieces. I can't do what you can do : I can't slip inside my shell and wait for things to pass. I dont know for a fact that you are really like that, but sometimes you give me that impression. I often envy that in you, which may be why i led you around in circles. - (An extract from the second letter of Naoko, Norwegian Wood)

2011-04-30T04:51:00.000+08:00

I WISHED TO BE FREE FROM ACHES & PAINS.

- An Old lady , Singapore Gaga

2011-04-30T03:55:00.001+08:00

“And I can’t make you love me if you don’t
You can’t make your heart feel something it won’t
And here in the dark in these final hours
I will lay down my heart and I’ll feel the power
But you won’t, no, you won’t
And I can’t make you love me
If you don’t”

—	George Micheal “I cant make you love me”

2011-04-30T03:52:00.001+08:00

“Suddenly everything in the world makes sense, because without the crap and the death and the drudgery and the endlessness of life, it would be impossible for passion to exist.”

—	Douglas Coupland (Player One)

2011-04-30T03:51:00.001+08:00

“There’s good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad.”

—	Kurt Cobain’s Suicide Note (via songsgetlouder)

2011-04-30T03:49:00.001+08:00

“Do you miss him at the most happy and fulfilling times of your life? Just because you miss him when the world is quiet and you feel alone doesn’t mean you love him. you will miss anyone when you’re lonely. It’s when your life is going great and you still feel that ache in your heart because he isn’t there to see the genuine smile on your face and happiness in your life.”

—	(via eletheowl)

2011-04-30T03:47:00.001+08:00

“

Where roads are made I lose my way.

In the wide water, in the blue sky there is no line of a track.

The pathway is hidden by the birds’ wings, by the star-fires, by the flowers of the wayfaring seasons.

And I ask my heart if its blood carries the wisdom of the unseen way.

”

—	Rabindranath Tagore does that really happen?

2011-04-30T03:43:00.000+08:00

i miss you like crazy

Remember the Moffats?

2011-04-28T09:25:00.001+08:00

Who is the devil eating my sleep?
it's crazy how erratic my sleeping habits have become. Awake by night, sleep by day. I'm living the life of the opposite. I should be happy but I am sad. I should be schooling but i am bumming.. I asked for this didn't I? I think I'm some sort of an angel of trouble.

yes, I'm the angel of trouble.

2011-04-28T03:19:00.002+08:00

i realized i have neglected my red beret for a really long time :(

2011-04-28T02:32:00.002+08:00

“Field after field lies under the dead stalks of last year’s corn and soybeans, or lies broken for the next crop; one may drive many miles between fields that are either sodded or planted in winter grain. If the weather is wet, the country will seem virtually deserted. If the ground is dry enough to support their wheels, there will be tractors at work, huge machines with glassed cabs, rolling into the distance of fields larger than whole farms used to be, as solitary as seaborne ships.”

- Wendell Berry, Bringing It to the Table: On Farming and Food

2011-04-27T02:02:00.000+08:00

I am trying to find this song on google and youtube... the lyrics goes like this...
'something comes around.... i can see it in your eyes...' so far the results are
pretty bad but i managed to find other songs! Hahaha Treasures (:

I can see the pain living in your eyes
And I know how hard you try
You deserve to have much more
I can feel your heart and I simpathize
And I'll never criticize
All you've ever meant to my life

I don't want to let you down
I don't want to lead you on
i don't want to hold you back
From where you might belong

You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to say but goodbye

You deserve the chance at the kind of love
I'm not sure i'm worthy of
Losing you is painful to me

I don't want to let you down
I don't want to lead you on
i don't want to hold you back
From where you might belong

You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to say but goodbye

You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to try
Though it's gonna hurt us both
There's no other way than to say goodbye

I can see it in your eyes,
you're telling me a lie when you said you loved me
and there's something in your smile,
said you'd be gone in awhile,
so how can you love me

I can hear it in your talk,
you're about to take a walk,
so darlin' please don't lie,
I've been knowing you way too long,
so don't say there's nothing wrong,
you could never fool me, know how

I can see it in your eyes,
what you're trying to disguise,
I can feel it in your touch,
you've fallen out of love,
you could tell me that I'm wrong,
my heart knows I'm right,
I can see it in your eyes

So if it's over, let it be over,
I'd rather face the truth than have to make believe your feelings haven't changed,
Yes, I'll be all right,
after you say good bye,
and I know that I'll be missing you, for a long long time.

I can see it in your eyes,
what you're trying to disguise,
I can feel it in your touch,
you've fallen out of love,
you could tell me that I'm wrong,
my heart knows I'm right,
I can see it in your eyes

You could tell me that I'm wrong,
my heart knows I'm right
I can see it in your eyes
I feel the wind rushing through my hair,
I've got the sun down on my face,
I reach for the future, I won't look back,
I wanna be free and leave it all behind,

And I long to see
Long to see the sunlight in your eyes,
In your eyes

I close my eyes and sense a mystery
The scent of flowers in the air
I've seen all the beauty, in everything
Knowing it's real I feel so alive

And I long to see
Long to see the sunlight in your eyes,
In your eyes
What on earth am I meant to do
In this crowded place there is only you
Was gonna to leave now I have to stay
You have taken my breath away

Is the world still spinning around
I don't feel like coming down

It's in your eyes
I can tell what your thinking
My heart is sinking too
It's no surprise
I've been watching you lately
I want to make it with you

Destiny has a funny way
When it comes and takes all your cares away
I can't think of a single thing
Other than what a beautiful state I'm in

Is the world still spinning around
I don't feel like coming down

It's in your eyes
I can tell what your thinking
My heart is sinking too
It's no surprise
I've been watching you lately
I want to make it with you
You take me higher and smoother
than any plane
You move me faster and further
than any train

I'll never let go

Please let my dry your tears
and take away your fears
Wouldn't it be nice
heaven in your eyes

We we're on a highway to loveland
I guess we we're heading that way
You're in my heart now and somehow
I feel you're here to stay

I'll never let go

Please let my dry your tears
and take away your fears
Wouldn't it be nice
heaven in your eyes

You shoot in my heart
an arrow of angels
And I feel down
when you're not around
let me help you

Please let my dry your tears
and take away your fears
Wouldn't it be nice
heaven in your eyes
In your eyes
I can see your smiling in your eyes
I know that you love me in your eyes
I can see you smiling in your eyes
Always

Baby I am just a silly silly romantic fool
Tryin' to capture you always
Forever and a day
I will love just you
Your All I ever wanted to love
Woman you know that I would die for you
Cry for you
Ma arms are forever open wide for you
N you need not av no fear
Ill forever be here
Cuz woman you no that im a part of you
With Ma heart, ma body, ma mind, ma soul
Its written in the skies that we were meant to be
Forever yours n your forever mine I can see it in your eyes

In your eyes
I can see your smiling in your eyes
I know that you love me in your eyes
I can see you smiling in your eyes
Always

You no ill be there
Ill still care
Ill see you
We can be friends
We can pretend
That what we got will never end coz its just to hot and
Everytime in ma life that I feel that I cant go on
Coz I gotta stay strong n ma life will end
And ill feel like this we see whats wrong
I wanna bring all your fantasies together
Take you to heaven (heaven)
Whenever your feelin' down and out
Ill be there for you
Yes I will
Whatever the situation
Your all confused
Baby im here to take the pain
So you can keep that smile

In your eyes
I can see your smiling in your eyes (you love me in your eyes)
I know that you love me in your eyes
I can see you smiling in your eyes (in your eyes girl)
Always (in my heart)
I can see the smile forming in your eyes
I can feel the comfort in your smile
I can feel the warmth when im with you
I will never let u down baby
I can see the smile forming in your eyes
I can feel the comfort in your smile
I can feel the warmth when im with you
I will never let you down
I think I finally know you
I can see beyond your smile
I think that I can show you
That what we have is still worth while

Don't you know that love is like a thread
That keeps unraveling the bed
It ties us back together in the end

In your eyes
I can see my dreams reflections
In your eyes
I found the answers to my questions
In your eyes
I can see the reason why our love's alive
In your eyes
We're drifting safely back to shore
And I think I've finally learned to love you more

And you warned me that life changes
And that know one really knows
Whether time will make us strangers
Or whether time will make us grow

Ohh, even though the winds of time will change
In a world where nothing stays the same
Through it all, our love will still remain

In your eyes
I can see my dreams reflections
In your eyes
I found the answers to my questions
In your eyes
I can see the reason why our love's alive
In your eyes
We're drifting safely back to shore
And I think I've finally learned to love you more

In your eyes
I can see the reason why our love's alive
In your eyes
You and I
We're drifting safely back to shore
And I think I've finally learned to love you more
Love I get so lost, sometimes
days pass and this emptiness fills my heart
when I want to run away
I drive off in my car
but whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are

all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light
the heat I see in your eyes

love, I don't like to see so much pain
so much wasted and this moment keeps slipping away
I get so tired of working so hard for out survival
I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive

and all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light,
the heat I see in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes
You're standing there on the borderline
You're looking for the way
Trying to find your mystic island
Where is the place to stay?

Cause when you look, you will realize
This life is all you've got
You must fight for freedom
Deep inside your heart

Careless whispers - And hopeless dreams
I cannot believe - What it really means

IN YOUR EYES
THERE'S NO MAGIC DEEP INSIDE
IN YOUR SMILE
THERE WAS LAUGHTER FOR A WHILE

You're looking back to the life you've had
You try to hold your dreams
Where's the way back to your paradise?
Is it what it seems?

But you must learn to accept your life
With all the different signs
Then you will get your real magic back
Somewhere between the lines

Careless whispers - And hopeless dreams
I cannot believe - What it really means

IN YOUR EYES...

Enjoy your private memories
But open up your mind
You must live your life today
And leave the past behind

IN YOUR EYES...
I can still remember, long ago
Living in the fast lane, never slow
And nothing that could come between me and you

I still hear the words I thought were cheap
You should always look before you leap
And I never realised those words were oh so true

Bridge

I hope that you can hear me
Though you're living in another world
Throwing shadows upon earth

Chorus

In your eyes, I could drown and still survive
In your eyes, I could see how to live my life
But if only I knew
That chances were few
Maybe I would still be with you

Several thoughts I can't define
Living on a dream, seems like a crime
But every now and then it's hard to ignore

'Cause only in my dreams I find a clue
when i try to build a memory of you
I know our love will be much stronger than before
I think I finally know you
I can see beyond your smile
I think that I can show you
That what we have is still worthwhile
Don't you know that love's just like the thread
That keeps unravelling but then
It ties us back together in the end

(Chorus)
In your eyes, I can see my dream's reflections
In your eyes, found the answers to my questions
In your eyes, I can see the reasons why our love's alive
In your eyes, we're drifting safely back to shore
And I think I've finally learned to love you more

You warned me that life changes
That no one really knows
Whether time would make us strangers
Or whether time would make us grow
Even though the winds of time will change
In a world where nothing stays the same
Through it all our love will still remain

(Repeat Chorus)
In your eyes, I can see the reasons why our love's alive
In your eyes, we're drifting safely back to shore
And I think I've finally learned to love you more
Doesn't she look so well
With her long black hair and (???) she can tell
Doesn't she know so well
She can cast a spell with that look of heaven
In her eyes, in her eyes
In your eyes, your eyes

Now I can't get to sleep
I dream and dream all the day through
Doesn't seem to matter though
Doesn't seem to worry me
I can't get to sleep
I dream and dream, honest I do
Honest I do, dream of you

Couln't we be away
On a different day could be so unusual
Couldn't we try to be
What the others say, what they think they see there
In your eyes, in your eyes
In your eyes, your eyes

Now I have been a fool
I've been in love, haven't we all
Everybody does it though
Every time we keep going back again
I've made that mistake
I dream and dream honest I do
Honest I do dream of you

Wouldn't it feel the same
Is it just a game that we play from time to time
Wouldn't I feel so good
If I understood what I see is written there
In your eyes, in your eyes
In your eyes, your eyes

Now when towards the end
I'm feeling blue and everything's wrong
Doesn't matter at the time
Doesn't matter this time anyway
I can't get to sleep
I dream and dream, honest I do
Honest I do dream, oh I can't get to sleep
I dream and dream, honest I do
Honest I do dream of you
You know my heart ain't feeling right
You walk these streets again tonight
I must be strong - but it's heard when you're away
Cause i know where you're going and the games that you play
Now these streets are growing cold
A fire burns tonight where love is gold
I'm a fool to believe in the simple things you say
I can't face tomorrow ; can't face another day

In your eyes
I see a fire burning
The hands of time keep turning - how long will you be mine ?
In your eyes
I see a life tomorrow
Filled with pain and sorrow - forsaken by the lies
in your eyes

Everyday just feels the same
Loving you is such a lonely game
In the heat of the night you hear me calling out to you
Words are spoken but your eyes show the truth

In your eyes
I see a fire burning
The hands of time keep turning - how long will you be mine ?
In your eyes
I see a life tomorrow
Filled with pain and sorrow - forsaken by the lies
in your eyes
In your eyes
I see a fire burning
The hands of time keep turning - how long will you be mine ?
In your eyes
I see a life tomorrow
Filled with pain and sorrow - forsaken by the lies
ïn your eyes

2011-04-26T02:30:00.000+08:00

Phy came over this afternoon! Knowing my new found love for Koi,
she bought Koi before heading over to my place. The afternoon was
spend peacefully over some fatty indulgences like pizzas and a nice
film.

Thank phy (:

2011-04-26T02:00:00.002+08:00

The perfect moment.

My dear friend got me hooked onto this song.
She was telling me about her perfect moment and me being so anti-love could
somehow feel her perfect moment and felt her happiness which was so endearing.
It really touched my broken heart.

McCutcheon vocal's and music arrangement brought out the essence of the
true meaning of a perfect moment. A song perfect for the moment you want to
cherish for eternity. And yes, we should cherish the happy moments while it
last as nothing last forever.

enjoy.

This is my moment
This is my perfect moment with you
This is what God meant
This is my perfect moment with you
I wish I could freeze this space in time
The way I feel for you inside

This is my moment
This is my perfect moment with you
Tell me you love me when you leave
You’re more than a shadow, that’s what I believe
You take me to places I never thought I’d see
Minute by minute you are the world to me

I wish I could frame the look in your eyes
The way that i feel for you inside

This is my moment
This is my perfect moment with you

And if tomorrow brings a lonely day
Here and now i know I haven’t lived in vain
I’ll cry my tears in the rain
and if love never comes again
I can always say I’ve been
to paradise skies in your eyes… in your eyes

So tell me you love me the moment you leave
You’re more than a shadow, I’ve just to believe

I wish I could keep you all of my life
The way that I feel for you inside

This is my moment
This is my perfect moment with you
This is my moment
This is my perfect moment
With you, with you..

2011-04-26T01:46:00.000+08:00

Black Swan

A Darren Aronofsky film

When i was 6 years old, my ambition was to be a ballerina. I used to prance around

the living room, pretending to be some famous ballerina. Black Swan brought back

my childhood dreams even though my hopes and dreams were dashed by my

Ballet teacher who kept condemning me.

I'm not good in expressing on how i feel towards a film. As for Black Swan,

Natalie Portman really played her role so well that she truly deserves the Academy

award for best actress. She definitely gave me the chills throughout the film. It shows

about the competitiveness, the pressure of the industry and how she managed to find

herself as a dancer. To find the Black Swan in her.

that's all i have to say.

xoxo

2011-04-25T07:50:00.002+08:00

When you're sad & lonely,
You see the world being better than you.
You wallowed yourself in your pathetic self pithiness , wishing that the world will just stop for you. You become this self centered and selfish person. You think that your problem is more important and you secretly look down upon other people's problems where you feel it can't hold a candle to yours. Sadness,lonely,bitterness,hatred,cruelness,death,miserable, breathlessness are all you could think about. The world seems to be a trashy place. You clammed up like a shell, doing things to hurt you. if you smoke, the intake just increases day by day. You turned to things that helps you take away your sorrows...

You don't know how to continue with life like how I do not know how to end this post..

Cheers,
The sad girl.

2011-04-25T06:54:00.001+08:00

Desperado, why won't you come to your senses?

Didn't they say, things will get better as time moves on ?
Isn't it ridiculous that minute things affects me. I honestly feel
there's something conspiring to bring me down. Nonetheless, i wished
i fell into concussion that day and forget whatever has happened.
That would be the absolute remedy to my speedy recovery.
I really want to forget this mess. I feel guilty letting my love ones
see me like this.

I cannot stand the routine of grieving every night and waking up with
a heavy heart.... foolishly wishing that everything was just a nightmare and
spending my weekends with the 4 white walls. I am not happy person.
Just a lonely 21 year old who is being very stupid.

Why grieve over someone who don't even give two shoots about you?
who is malicious enough to kill your soul and the good name of love.
Through all these, i learnt, never to love someone more than yourself.

2011-04-24T06:14:00.002+08:00

Johnny Thunders 'I Was Born To Cry'

2011-04-23T09:15:00.002+08:00

Singapore Gaga.

Watch the uptil 1:23 minutes. I love the song that the Busker is performing.

Wasted Days & Wasted Nights
I have left for you behind
For you don't belong to me
Your heart belongs
To someone else
Why should i keep loving you
When i know you're not true
Then why i should i call your name?
When you're the blame
For making me blue.

2011-04-23T00:11:00.001+08:00

One HELL of a night.

I was intoxicated.

The feeling of a burning throat and churning stomach was indeed

excruciating. The alcohol dancing inside my stomach was causing

great discomfort to every inch of my body.

So be careful of what you wished for. A few days ago, i wish i could get

high over alcohol? I think i over-did the wish.

goodnight.

2011-04-20T08:26:00.000+08:00

Bridget Bardot, One of my favourite actresses of all time.

This scene is taken from the film, Le mépris (The contempt) 1963

2011-04-20T07:33:00.000+08:00

Foolish little girl - The Shirelles

You broke his heart and made him cry
And he's been blue since then
Now he's found somebody new
And you want him back again"

Foolish little girl, fickle little girl
You didn't want him when he wanted you
He's found another love, it's her he's dreaming of
And there's not a single thing that you can do

"But I love him"
"No you don't it's just your pride that's hurt"
" I still love him"
(If you got him back again
You'd go right out and do him dirt)

Foolish little girl, fickle little girl
You didn't want him when he wanted you
He's found another love, it's her he's dreaming of
And there's not a single thing that you can do

"But I love him"
"It's too late to have a change of heart"
"I still love him"
(Tomorrow is his wedding day
And you'll keep quiet if you're smart)

Foolish little girl, fickle little girl
You didn't want him when he wanted you
He's found another love, it's her he's dreaming of
And there's not a single thing that you can do

"Forget him 'cause he don't belong to you"
"It's too late he's found somebody new"
"There's not a single thing that you can do"

2011-04-20T06:01:00.001+08:00

“I think we’re all a little like Alice. Every time I leave the comfort of my home I feel like I’m tumbling down a rabbit hole. Things I don’t understand pass me by and I can’t stop it. I can’t just press pause like when I’m watching the movie, can I? We’re all falling down rabbit holes and being thrown into some kooky wonderland that makes absolutely no sense. We meet crazy people, we do mad things. Life is an abstract painting, a surreal dream, a dying wish. At the end of it all, we’re just trying to work out who we are and why we’re here. Then before you know it, you’ve woken up and you’re in a different world. But it’s still as crazy, perhaps even more than the one you were in before. We’re all just confused, and we live together in mutual confusion and try and help each other work out what it all means.”

—	Valeri Fandangle

2011-04-18T02:50:00.000+08:00

2011-04-18T02:40:00.000+08:00

2011-04-18T02:22:00.001+08:00

“If you look inside a girl, you would see how much she really cries, you would find so many secrets and lots of lies. But what you will really see is how hard it is to stay so strong when nothing is right, and everything is wrong.”

—	(via eletheowl)

2011-04-18T02:10:00.000+08:00

sorry if i'm too heartless.

The word 'HEARTLESS'... play around with it... it means no heart.

My heart has been played, punctured and stepped on.

I need to go on a quest with Dorothy to find myself a heart.

A heart with SOUL as i've became a Tin Woman.

2011-04-18T02:00:00.000+08:00

Pain

who understands my pain?

2011-04-17T12:46:00.001+08:00

Fatigue is here to stay.
There's so many things piled up in me.
Thoughts, confusion, anger, grief.
I just do not know how to express myself
Neither do I want to sound like a broken record player. I'm not surprise if I start to just shut myself. it's my problem to deal with and it is the most heart-wrenching one.

I only know if i ever become a vegetable
Or someone whose brain got damaged, please donate my organs to someone who deserves it more than I do.

2011-04-17T06:57:00.001+08:00

liy is right,

i ain't normal. I think i might end up in an asylum.

2011-04-17T04:20:00.000+08:00

张震岳 - 爱我别走 ai wo bie zhou

You guys know i hardly listen to chinese songs because of my poor knowledge and standards

of the language. Chinese is a difficult language to master. Wait, i think all languages are difficult

to master. What is more shameful is that, i learnt chinese since i was in nursery.

Anyway, enjoy this song. I can't post this on my tumblr due to some personal reasons.

2011-04-16T04:32:00.000+08:00

Some things are just meant to be left the way it is?

Are we afraid that once we touch or do anything to that particular thing,

we might hinder or add on trouble ? Like causing the glass to shatter even more?

However, the question is, should we leave things hanging in the air?

Is that the only solution to all our problems?

Is avoiding the problem gonna help us automatically solved things? (we wished!)

I admit I am a coward too.I find it difficult to just walk up to the

person and just solve things. So i asked myself, what am i afraid of?

I guess i am afraid of facing the person's reaction, hearing his/her hurtful words that

might stained me forever or REJECTION.

I wished i could be braver at times and stop hiding like a chicken.

goodnight

2011-04-15T17:06:00.000+08:00

I need to stop waking up with my heart feeling like a dumbbell.
Sometimes it gets so heavy that i have difficulties breathing.
As though i've been through a nightmare. Everyday seems like
a nightmare to me.

oh please god, lighten up my heart will you?

2011-04-14T05:16:00.000+08:00

once i put my mind to it, i will follow through. no turning back.
its all in the mind right? yes it is all in the mind. If only i can
just change my brain.

2011-04-14T03:10:00.002+08:00

two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year.

& after years, i decided to smash the fishbowl to let us free.

Let us free from the pain and agony where each of us just

don't understand.

Swim freely fish & never come back.

2011-04-14T02:38:00.000+08:00

throbbing headache
uncertainty
insecureness
pounding heart

my body is just sad.

2011-04-13T20:43:00.000+08:00

Thanks for the beautiful gramophone

2011-04-12T05:08:00.000+08:00

False Accusation.

I find it ridiculously painful that how one can just turn the tables at you and get angry
over something that didn't even exist. First of all, i had a long day today and i survived
with just 2 hours of sleep. I sacrificed the most perfect weather to sleep in just to shop
for the present. It was so perfect that i was dozing off even when i was out of the house
braving the rainy weather.

I had no fucking idea how your deranged minds got to the idea that i was angry when
I myself did not even feel any form of anger or animosity coming from my side. Even
if my face was black, did i isolate myself? FYI, i did not even know i had a black face on.
Why do i even bother explaining myself from this unnecessary problems?
You all can go ahead and let your mind wander when there is no PROBLEM in the first
place. Blame your oversensitivity or your guilt or conscience!

All that being said, We all should grow up. We are fucking TWENTY ONE.

Now i know why guys fucking stand girls who exaggerate so much that they tend to
over-imagine things!
Maybe we should all have an imaginary friend! weeeeee!

ps : Even though this matter is ridiculous and i shouldn't even bother about it, i mean come on,

seriously? Are we that petty? Hence, all fights derived from a stupid problem that one can even

laughed at. After this post, i am not going to be bothered about this whole fucking situation.

PEACE.

2011-04-10T02:31:00.000+08:00

Forgive & Forget?

My friend and i were talking about this preach ' FORGIVE & FORGET'.

Do we really forgive and forget? Some people do forgive but they don't forget.

Or are we just saying this just to make ourselves feel better or just saying this

to shut the other party up or we don't have anything better to say?

Can one really forget the past and move on? I'm sure there will be this tiny

amount of grudge still left inside. And if we can really forgive and forget,

the world will be a better place wouldn't it? also wouldn't life be easier too?

You tell me, if someone harms your love ones, will you be able to forgive & forget?

If someone sexually harasses or cheats on you... will you be able to forgive & forget?

There is no such thing as FORGIVE & FORGET. That is a bad bullshit preach!

goodnight.

2011-04-09T20:15:00.001+08:00

You leave me speechless. You are so amazing.

God should just bless you seriously. -_-

Go ahead, go find someone you. I wish you all the best.

2011-04-09T18:46:00.002+08:00

2011-04-09T18:04:00.000+08:00

I just saw this from Jordan's blog and it make sense.

A sense of motivation to get through the every weekends

i detest. Bad things do not last forever.

2011-04-06T01:44:00.000+08:00

I wonder what goes through a killer's mind.

The power of having to take another person's life away &

the power of having more power than the other party.

2011-04-02T03:13:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wonder to myself.

Why me?
Why do i have to go through all these shit? Have i done something drastically
wrong that caused me this karma? It sucks to know that you don't even know
what you did to end up like this.

i feel so unjustified and so fucking unfair.

2011-04-02T02:47:00.001+08:00

whenever i think of you, i feel major resentment against you.
i try to think positive of you but i just can't. It irks me how you
treated me like i'm some kinda of pest and you could quickly
replaced me.

I swear if i had a choice and killing was legal, if you will be
so dead.

beware

2011-04-01T05:13:00.003+08:00

People post this screen graphs on tumblr due to the subtitles.

They do not know shit about this film 'Jules Et Jim'

That is Jane Seberg.

She's a beauty

2011-04-01T05:08:00.000+08:00

April.

1/3 of the year has gone by. April is the month filled of joy and celebration.
Let me conquer this year. I aim to be a better woman

2011-04-01T04:40:00.003+08:00

Stevie Wonder - Part Time Lover

Call up, ring once, hang up the phone
To let me know you made it home
Don't want nothing to be wrong with part-time lover

If she's with me I'll blink the lights
To let you know tonight's the night
For me and you my part-time lover

We are undercover passion on the run
Chasing love up against the sun
We are strangers by day, lovers by night
Knowing it's so wrong, but feeling so right

If I'm with friends and we should meet
Just pass me by, don't even speak
Know the word's "discreet" when part-time lovers

But if there's some emergency
Have a male friend to ask for me
So then she won't peek its really you my part-time lover

We are undercover passion on the run
Chasing love up against the sun
We are strangers by day, lovers by night
Knowing it's so wrong, but feeling so right

I've got something that I must tell
Last night someone rang our doorbell
And it was not you my part-time lover

And then a man called our exchange
But didn't want to leave his name
I guess that two can play the game
Of part-time lovers
You and me, part-time lovers
But, she and he, part-time lovers

2011-03-31T04:15:00.000+08:00

REJUVENATE REFRESH REBORN

I always believe that changing the way on how you look can make you feel like a

whole new person.Well i definitely can't change my looks because i do not believe

in plastic surgery or rather, i do not have the cash or the need to alter my physical

appearances. Hence the only thing i can change that would not harm my physical

appearances would be my hair. I mean even if i damaged my hair or turned into a

bald woman, i can always depend on wigs or formulas that are so advanced and

improved.

Hair is very important to us humans.. Hair can alter the way we look. Some

hairstyles can make us look so beautiful vice versa. Hair can also alter

our personalties and also people's judgement towards you.

For example, if you're a blonde, you just a dumb bimbo.

if you have a mohawk, people would think you're some punk

if you have dandruff or oily hair, people would think you're dirty

If you have a bad hair day or you had a bad dye job or bad hair cut, would you dare

go out and face the world? Normally people would wear a cap to hide their hideous

hair. When you have nice luscious long hair or a suave hair-do, you will definitely

feel confident!

Good hairstyles brings out the confidence in you.

That's why when i feel a need to rejuvenate, refresh and reborn, i will do something

to my hair. One year ago, i decided to chop my long beautiful hair to a short bob.As most

of you all knew, i was going through a rough patch and a change was needed.

When i left the hairdresser, i felt like a whole new person. My head felt much lighter

and i could feel the breeze touching the back of my neck. It was so invigorating!

Referencing from the above picture...

Yes, i was that daring to chop my hair that short. My friends were indeed

shocked by my actions. It took them quite a while to get used to it because

most of them preferred mu long hair. However right now, my friends are telling

me to cut it back short because they felt that was my prettiest period!

(This is a matter of getting used or adjusting to my new hair style people)

Well, i got bored and my hair went though many changes.

From Orange to Blonde to Green and then Red. However, the

colours fade and i had golden hair. I really hated this hairstyle.

After which i decided to dye my hair black and just now before the clock strike

12midnight, i decided to cut my fringe.

Thus a new look, a new me and a new adult

ready to enter the adultword legally.

goodnight.

2011-03-30T04:16:00.000+08:00

Well, i thought it was the right thing to do and it will be childish if i purposely avoided it.

I'm turning 21. I ought to think and act like an adult. April is coming. i can't believe how

time flew by.We became so foreign within months.

However, to me, no matter what shit you did, you're still important.

Happy birthday

2011-03-29T03:10:00.000+08:00

FORTUNATE?

I think im lucky to have friends who really do love me for who i am.
They will get so happy when they see me smile and whenever someone
made me upset, they would never fail to call me and assure me that everything
is going to be fine. I also appreciate their concern for me.

I may have lost good friends this year, but i realized i gained more good friends.

also i got to add,
i'm not going to give a fuck if you keep posting videos on her wall, she does the
same and upload a picture of you on her tumblr. I wished yall "the fucking best."
and all the more, you prove me right all the fucking time.

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!

2011-03-28T05:54:00.000+08:00

Random thoughts

Will i be lucky enough to find someone who loves me for the way i am? Who will be there at my lowest to cheer me up and make me feel like a woman?

sorry i lost my train of thoughts.

I am not going to care about any shit anymore.

Why care about things that only make me upset?

Its not worth my time and emotions.

It is all in the mind. I got to change this mindset of mine

he can go like anybody for all i care.

g'night.

2011-03-27T06:35:00.001+08:00

ITS OVER!!!!!

i have to live with that mindset

2011-03-27T06:31:00.001+08:00

How do you deal with a friend that is truly suicidal?

I just came back home from my friend's house. I am still appalled and shock by her words.
It was frightening that she gave herself one week more to settle this and wanted me to spread
her last words to the other girls. I was terrified. I did not know what to do. I can't afford to
lose another friend. She was like a bird trapped in a cage. Her pain, anguish and fear triggered
my emotions. I was fighting my tears back. I felt useless as i had no clue how to solve this
because she was so determined. Before she met me, she was already climbing onto the ledge
of her condo but thank heavens she chickened out. I don't how to deal with this matter. I think
if she really let go, i will sink into further depression. How many times God wants me to sink
to my lowest? I already have sunk during the early parts of the year and i am still trying to build
myself up. I am worried i might become like her. It is all in the mind. Why do we let our brains
control ourselves? We should be the one controlling our minds.

I pray that nothing happens to my friend. please please

2011-03-27T01:36:00.000+08:00

A week to Adulthood.

While i was walking back home, the roads suddenly became quiet and i sank into my own world.
There was peace and serenity in the atmosphere. All i could hear was my footsteps. The thought of me getting harm or spook by something disappeared. All i could think about was my life and whether i was happy with it. I am turning 21 next Sunday. No big celebrations or maybe no celebrations at all. Birthdays to me were always a reminder that I am one step closer to death. Well, you can't blame me for being a pessimist but don't you agree? I will have to face more responsibilities, choices and obstacles.

I am not ready to be an adult.

2011-03-26T18:18:00.000+08:00

Dame Elizabeth Taylor

Taylor was known for her roles in films like Cleopatra & Butterfield 8. Over her 62 years in the film industry, she has clinched numerous awards like the Academy. She was a brilliant actress since she was a child and her captivating beauty and violet eyes won the hearts of many around the world. With such beauty, she was the most photographed actress apart from Marilyn Normajeane Monroe. Despite being in 8 stormy marriages and near-death experiences , she was a ferocious intelligent lady who cared as she was a social activist.

Taylor left the world with style. She even requested her funeral to be 15 minutes later than the stipulated time. Talk about being fashionably late.

Rest in peace Dame Elizabeth Taylor and thank you for creating history worth to be remembered.

2011-03-26T17:48:00.002+08:00

2011-03-26T17:47:00.002+08:00

2011-03-25T05:01:00.002+08:00

Forrest Gump 1994

One of the greatest films of all time.

ps: I actually do have a lot of thoughts about this film. However i got

my thoughts all jumbled up and i don't even know what to talk about this

film anymore.

I only know in life, we often complicate ourselves. Its like walking a straight line but we

do not follow that straight line and turn it into a maze. All i can say that is that, we should leave

the past behind and move forward. Dwelling in the past leaves you nowhere.

Goodnight

2011-03-24T23:46:00.000+08:00

Father & Son

ITS A WRAP!

A few weeks ago, Jesseline facebook message me about helping out in the Art department for her Final Year Project. At first i was skeptical because i was afraid of the Level 3s' presences.. I had a bad experience at the previous shoot 'Taking Flight' because i was clueless on why they ignored me when i never even do anything to them?' (FYI They are Wilson's classmates )

Despite the long hours and lack of sleep, I'm still thankful for this opportunity. I felt this time, i learnt more and made new friends! Even though it was embarrassing that the lecturers and Levels 2 knew who the hell i was, I still had fun. The shoot was even more exciting with Clarissa, Jeremy, Jesseline, Kai En and Clarence around!

But all good things must come to an end. I hope to be involved in more production in the future. I also wished i could upload the pictures onto blogger to share my joy but blogger refuse to accept my pictures! Please do check out my Tumblr for my pictorial posts.

xoxo

2011-03-23T04:53:00.003+08:00

NO INSPIRATION TO BLOG
I HAVE NO WORDS IN MY MIND
TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS.
G'NIGHT

2011-03-23T04:43:00.001+08:00

Hopelessly Devoted To You (Olivia Newton John)

Guess mine is not the first heart broken,

My eyes are not the first to cry

I'm not the first to know,

There's just no gettin' over you

I'm just a fool who's willing

To sit around and wait for you

But baby can't you see,

There's nothin' else for me to do

I'm hopelessly devoted to you

But now there's nowhere to hide,

Since you pushed my love aside

I'm not in my head,

Hopelessly devoted to you

Hopelessly devoted to you,

Hopelessly devoted to you

My head is saying "fool, forget him",

My heart is saying "don't let go"

Hold on to the end,

That's what I intend to do

I'm hopelessly devoted to you

But now there's nowhere to hide,

Since you pushed my love aside

I'm not in my head,

Hopelessly devoted to you

am i always so hopelessly devoted to you that i can't break away and find another?

am i destined to be with you?

if only could someone answer my questions.

2011-03-23T03:40:00.000+08:00

WORDS MAY HURT FEELINGS

BUT SILENCE BREAKS HEARTS

2011-03-22T01:15:00.002+08:00

Sometimes you leave me confused.

I have no idea why do i have to be so nice especially to you.

It is like you're the 'NICE' button.

Please stop confusing me.

2011-03-22T01:15:00.000+08:00

Sometimes you leave me confused.
I have no idea why do i have to be so nice especially to you.
It is like you're the 'NICE' button.

Please stop confusing me.

2011-03-20T01:57:00.002+08:00

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND.

After a long day at 'Father & Son' shoot, I met up with Phy and Jas. When Phy left, we had a heart to heart talk. We talk about everything. She reminded me about the film 'eternal sunshine of the spotless mind'. She herself knew that was a very meaningful film. I fought back my tears so hard when i spoke to her. All the emotions that i have been trying to cease all came out. I am really thankful for her being there for me always. She also shared stories about her relationship with her boyfriend which made me understand that every relationship has their own obstacles and It's not simple as it looks. Thank you Jasmine. Really. Thank you.

Thank you for the early 21st birthday present.

A good luck Charm from Phuket. I will upload a close up on my tumblr.

SEE NO EVIL

SPEAK NO EVIL

HEAR NO EVIL

Here's some quotes to finish this post. Quotes that i always post so many times in this blog.

QUOTES

We'll dispose of these mementos when we're done here, that way you won't be confused by their unexplainable presence in your home.

Clementine: I don't need nice. I don't need myself to be it, and I don't need anybody else to be it at me.

Mary: Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.
[they click glasses]
Mary: Nietzsche. Beyond Good and Evil. Found it in my Bartlett's.

Joel: Are we like couples you see in restaurants? Are we the dining dead?

Carrie: She decided to erase you almost as a lark.

If only I could meet someone new. I guess my chances of that happening are somewhat diminished, seeing that I'm incapable of making eye contact with a woman I don't know.

2011-03-18T05:28:00.002+08:00

ALCOHOL.

It may take away your problems for awhile but it will return back.

The aftermath of it?
You will suffer from the pains of the hangover

Last night, alcohol took away all the problems I was currently facing.

My friends were so happy to see me laughing and smiling. I was back

to my normal noisy self, something that was missing since January.

After a few hours of enjoyment, i suffered from the pains of hangover.

The alcohol wouldn't leave my stomach. It was dancing

in my stomach. A celebratory dance of sufferings. I couldn't sleep

and my head started to swell. I was in tremendous pain.

It was just a few hours of fun and excitement but the pain i

suffered was long and excruciating. The thought of it makes me

shudder.

Alcohol.

It can be your friend

It can be your foe

You choose.

2011-03-16T06:25:00.000+08:00

Can my life get any worse ?

Despite all the problems i'm facing, i tried to pick myself up.
It was working.The only thing that made me smile was Japan. I always dreamt
of going there and i was looking forward to it.

Now, A catastrophe has happened in Japan. 3 explosions from the nuclear plants.
The parts of Japan has been wiped out and engulfed by the hungry waters of the world.
My dreams of going to Japan is all dashed.

People expect big things for their 21st. I have nothing to expect. I don't even want to
expect.

I don't understand why all these bad things have to affect me or come into my life.
It is like stacking up hoping that i will plummet and fall. It is as though somebody has
placed black magic on me. Why can't i turn my life back to normal? Why must i
force and accommodate all the time? I have my wants and needs too but nobody gives
a shit.

God, why do you have to make Japan go through this shit? What did you even create
natural disasters when you know its gonna wiped out mankind? ?!!!

i'm done here.

2011-03-16T05:59:00.005+08:00

CATASTROPHE.

-a sudden and widespread disaster: the catastrophe of war.

-any misfortune, mishap, or failure; fiasco:
The play was sopoor our whole evening was a catastrophe.

-a final event or conclusion, usually an unfortunate one;
a disastrous end:
the great catastrophe of the Old South atAppomattox.

-(in a drama) the point at which the circumstances overcome
the central motive, introducing the close or conclusion;
dénouement.
Compare catastasis, epitasis, protasis.

-eology . a sudden, violent disturbance, especially of a part
of the
surface of the earth; cataclysm.

-Also called catastrophe function. Mathematics . any of themathematical
functions that describe the discontinuities thatare treated in
catastrophe theory.

2011-03-16T05:35:00.000+08:00

Some people pass through your life and you never think about them again. Some you think about and wonder what ever happened to them. Some you wonder if they ever wonder what happened to you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do. -THE WONDER YEARS

2011-03-16T05:29:00.001+08:00

好人不会有事?

Do you believe in that?

I dont.

The good usually suffers and the evil always win.

2011-03-15T19:41:00.001+08:00

2011-03-14T19:53:00.003+08:00

Vulnerable days.

Michael Jackson.
He was a successful brilliant superstar and a generous philanthropist. Even though he was such an amazing individual, there were so many people who was after his money and wanted to bring him down. The false accusation about his life and plastic surgery made people question him as a person. With his giving and naive personality, he trusted people so easily
which led him to even more problems like the molestation trials
which really tarnished his name. Michael Jackson passed away tragically
and most people pitied and felt sorry for him instead of remembering his successes in life.

Michael Jacskon is my idol. I remembered him for his successes on his career as a successful entertainer. What i can relate to him is about how everyone decided to make rumors and false accusation in his life without hearing his explanations. I can imagine the pain and suffering which caused him to be paranoid and insecure around people.

I was someone who thought this world was nothing but daises and ponies. Now, i see this world is just harsh. Maybe isolating myself will help me to stay away from getting hurt. Maybe loneliness is the best solution for me.

RIP MICHAEL JACKSON.

2011-03-12T00:26:00.002+08:00

2011-03-11T16:59:00.001+08:00

Finally got to watch this Joanthan Femme's film.

here's the story line if you havent watched this film (TAKEN FROM IMDB)

Young FBI agent Clarice Starling is assigned to help find a missing woman to save her from a psychopathic serial killer who skins his victims. Clarice attempts to gain a better insight into the twisted mind of the killer by talking to another psychopath Hannibal Lecter, who used to be a respected psychiatrist. FBI agent Jack Crawford believes that Lecter who is also a very powerful and clever mind manipulator have the answers to their questions to help locate the killer. Clarice must first try and gain Lecter's confidence before he is to give away any information.

Howard Feuer did an amazing job in the casting. He chose the right actors/actresses for each roles. Jodie foster aka Agent Clarice Starling portrayed the myriad of emotions very well. From strong to vulnerable. Not forgetting Anthony Hopkins aka Dr Hannibal Lecter. He gave me the chills when he said 'Hannibal Lecter: A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.' Anthony Hopkins really played his role well as a manipulative psychopath. I really like the relationship between Clarice and Hannibal. How he managed to set himself in her mind.

I felt the plot of the story was good. While i was watching the film, there were some intense scenes which froze my heart and kept me on my feet. My mind was blown and couldn't stop thinking about the film. About Hannibal Lecter and Clarice... How Hannibal lecter could eat the nurse's tongue with his pulse not going above 85... which shows it was nothing to him. Like how he could listen to classical music after murdering two police mens...

Not forgetting Buffalo Bill who gets size 14 woman's skin to make him a woman suit. What he covets for.

2011-03-10T04:23:00.002+08:00

2011-03-10T02:37:00.002+08:00

I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.
Delicious Ambiguity.

— Gilda Radner (via justbesplendid)

(via quote-book)

this quote speaks about my current thoughts. I always believed in a perfect ending. My perfect ending. However My life became all about ambiguity. Some days i find myself lost in a whirlpool. Everything just happened so fast. People you love and care about could just disappear within minutes. Sometimes i wonder is this just a dream.

I hope to see the light one day. to clear all my ambiguous thoughts.

2011-03-09T04:05:00.000+08:00

I love it how i wake up feeling like crap everyday and end the day feeling like a champion.

Today, i managed to accomplish something, EXERCISING!

My friends have been advising me to run because it helps release stress and keeps you fit! So today, i was very determine to start on my exercise regime! Just look at the picture, i looked so fat there!! Can you see my belly and chunky thighs?

Hence to feel & look good, i have to work for it.

From today onwards, I'm going to love me more by complimenting myself.

I need to love myself before i can love others.

A confident lady is an attractive lady!

HENCE,

CHEERS TO CONFIDENCE!

2011-03-08T15:26:00.002+08:00

Artist : Hermits Herman's
Title : No Milk Today
-----------------
No milk today, my love has gone away
The bottle stands for lorn, a symbol of the dawn
No milk today, it seems a common sight
But people passing by don't know the reason why

How could they know just what this message means
The end of my hopes, the end of all my dreams
How could they know the palace there had been
Behind the door where my love reigned as queen

No milk today, it wasn't always so
The company was gay, we'd turn night into day

But all that's left is a place dark and lonely
A terraced house in a mean street back of town
Becomes a shrine when I think of you only
Just two up two down

No milk today, it wasn't always so
The company was gay, we'd turn night into day
As music played the faster did we dance
We felt it both at once, the start of our romance

How could they know just what this message means
The end of my hopes, the end of all my dreams
How could they know a palace there had been
Behind the door where my love reigned as queen

No milk today, my love has gone away
The bottle stands forlorn, a symbol of the dawn

But all that's left is a place dark and lonely
A terraced house in a mean street back of town
Becomes a shrine when I think of you only
Just two up two down

No milk today, my love has gone away
The bottle stands forlorn, a symbol of the dawn
No milk today, it seems a common sight
But people passing by don't know the reason why

How could they know just what this message means
The end of my hopes, the end of all my dreams
How could they know a palace there had been
Behind the door where my love reigned as queen

No milk today, it wasn't always so
The company was gay, we'd turn night into day

But all that's left is a place dark and lonely
A terraced house in a mean street back of town
Oh all that's left is a place dark and lonely
A terraced house in a mean street back of town
Oh all that's left is a place dark and lonely
A terraced house in a mean street back of town

2011-03-07T03:21:00.001+08:00

Improvement

It has been almost 3 months since we last spoke. My friends told me that i've improved and i love to hear that because that shows i'm not stagnant and i'm moving. My appetite has gained back and thank god I still maintained one stick a day. I just need to cure my sleep deprivation and find a job to help me move on further. No doubt i might break down again. But for now, i feel stronger and its all thanks to my girls.

thank you all.

xoxo

2011-03-05T03:52:00.001+08:00

MOVE ON MARIL.
THERE'S NO TURNING BACK
DON'T EXPECT.
DON'T WISH.
ITS OVER.

2011-03-05T03:46:00.000+08:00

The evil seems to win all the time.

The good will be mistaken for the bad.

What's the use of being good anyway?